Why a privately adopted kid cares about those family-less rascals in foster care.


I was adopted privately. For those who aren’t quite sure what “privately” means, it means I was never in foster care. I was born in a Catholic hospital, in a room packed with my birth parents, my parents and about 8 nuns (at least that’s how I picture it). I went straight from the birthing canal, to my birth dad’s arms, to my birth mom’s arms, to my mom’s arms, and surely to my dad’s arms at some point. I can’t quite remember.

When people hear I was privately adopted there are two main responses, one of which I will discuss now, one of which I will discuss later. Promise.

  1. “You never lived with your birth parents? Then how can you say that adopted kids have issues? You have always had your parents.” (Will discuss this gem, later)
  2. “Adoption is your topic, why do you talk about foster kids? Why does that Adopted Girl Inc. (the non-profit I founded) focus on foster kids when you were never one?”

I would Like to address #2 with a few brief points.

  • First and foremost I would like to point out that one does not need to have experienced a situation first hand in order to care about people who are going through that situation. For instance, many people who have never had Breast Cancer care about Breast Cancer research and awareness.   Yes, I was never in foster care. It does not logically follow that I should not care about foster kids.
  • Adoption and foster care are inextricably linked. You know how I know that? There are over 100,000 foster children in the United States waiting to be adopted. Bam.
  • When I was in kindergarten, my teacher Mrs. L (that really was what we called her, I’m not trying to hide her identity) taught me about The Golden Rule. As a refresher, the golden rule essentially tells you to treat others as you would like to be treated.

FOLLOWING the golden rule, I think, if I had been a kid left family-less instead of a kid born to a couple who took the time to find adoptive parents, I would pray to all that is good in the universe that people would care and would try to help me.   I would want guidance and support just like all the kids with parents. I would dream of creating a good life for myself. I would dream of someone teaching me how to create such a life. With That Adopted Girl Inc., I am treating these kids the way I would want to be treated were I in their position, instead of the position I was blessed with.

I could go on. I will leave it with the above points. Essentially, whether through nature, through nurture, or a combination of both, I was filled with a great deal of empathy.

LOVE always and forever,



3 thoughts on “Why a privately adopted kid cares about those family-less rascals in foster care.

  1. Thanks so much for supporting foster kiddos. I think we’ve discussed before…Hubby and I adopted two from foster care, now ages 8 & 10. They were 5 & 7 when they arrived, and it took 20 months to get them adopted thanks to an unfortunate social worker (who is no longer with the system). As an adoptive mom, I can vouch for the fact that A) foster kids are tough to handle and B) foster kids need families who will love and support them. Let me know if I can help in any way. XO


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